Connect in the back of the net

‘Twas the week before Christmas,
and Chelsea are doomed,
Sacking their manager - Mourinho,
they fumed!

The boardroom were ruthless,
he has to go,
And off he went - the prodigal

The ‘special one’ just gazed
as he was read the last rites,
But he didn’t care - it wasn’t
a surprise!

A lady physio - was jumping
for joy,
She’d won her battle - Jose,
to destroy!

The players all wept as they
lost their hero,
Jose Mourinho - they called;
‘Captain Nemo!’

‘The Chelsea club was now
in trouble,
Who would help them? They’re
trapped in a bubble!

The blues are definitely all
singing the blues,
But why are they all dancing -
on hearing this news?’

The boardroom will pay him
a massive big fee,
But Mourinho shrugs it all off -
and heads home for his tea.

‘Chelsea are chasing a guy
called; Van Gaal,
From Manchester United -
will he hear their call?’

The game of football is so
full of woes,
Anything is possible - anything

The special one is no more -
as he heads out the door,
His mega fat wages - Mourinho,
does adore.

The owners have seen the
last of him now;
But Mourinho will be chuckling;
‘he’s the special one’, somehow!’

The players are gathering to
meet their new gaffer,
But who should come in - with
a clank and a clatter!

Yes, Mourinho is Santa - he
shouts: ‘Ho! Ho! Ho!
He’s now gone to Lapland
with his elves, well in tow!

He turns to Chelsea and grins
like a king,
With ten million quid - oh, I will
wear some bling!

So now it’s all over - It’s
goodbye to Chelsea;
‘Will they play better - we’ll
just wait and see!’

‘Merry Christmas I say - as I
feel no dismay;
‘I’ve got “ten million pounds”
- “hip-pip”…hooray!!!!’


Written by Darryl Ashton 

Follow Darryl on Twitter @AlfGarnettJnr

Check out more of his brilliant work at his Google+ page

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