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| Taken from Hunter’s World of Football |
The Summer Transfer Window: A time for your team to add some players and move on those who may not be at a required standard for your club. The manager of the team you support, along with the scouts and board, are searching the globe for that bit of talent to fill in the gaps or to replace some already departing personnel.
As a fan it is natural for you to desire the feeling of being close to the action. So how do you acquire this feeling? Fairly simple: You follow this in-depth guide you are about to read, except it’s not so in-depth and it’s a load of rubbish but we’ll just pretend it answers all of your problems.
Here is my guide to the perfect summer window from a supporters’ perspective.
Step 1: Study The Rumours
Rumours will come and go. They tend to begin once the season has ended, perhaps even before. Most of them are unlikely and should be laughed at. Some, though, are believable, however you should not believe any. Rumours can start from one troll clicking ‘Tweet’ so until there’s some reputable sources joining in with the spreading of said rumour, disregard the verisimilitude.
Look at the player being linked, is he worth the fee being mentioned? Will he add that little bit of quality? And, if of your interest, will he look good in the team kit? You must study the rumours, not superficially, but thoroughly. That should bring you smoothly onto the next step.
Step 2: Berate ITK’s
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| Taken from Twitter |
Following on from rumour studying you will need to decide what’s true and what isn’t. The chances are 98% of the time rumours are nonsense. And these rumours are more often than not spread by moronic egotists who purport to be in the know. And more often than not they of course know nothing.
They just spread rumours to quench their need for human attention to satisfy their imbecilic brains. Swear at them, call them names and do it vociferously. It’s the only way to go about it. Nobody likes a false ITK and it is your duty to criticise strongly whenever the opportunity arises.
Step 3: Scout linked players
Once a player is linked you need to gather as much information as you can. Their position, strengths, weaknesses, history, any bit of information you can find will do. There are many ways to scout a player. You can study their performance during the season using statistical analysis, you can check their rating on FIFA, Pro Evo or Football Manager.
Then there is everyone’s favourite: YouTube. Does a 3 minute video backed by a horrible song provide you with a definitive and informative review of a player? For some it does, but it doesn’t. YouTube videos are deceptive.
They only display the good bits, not the bad. Emile Heskey is Pelé based on a YouTube video. But once you’ve finally decided on a player and have your review and opinion ready, you move on to the next step.
Step 4: Share your ‘expert’ opinions
Now you’ve studied the rumours, criticised the ITK’s and have formed an opinion off the back of your scouting the next step is to share it. Do you think the player will work out? Has the manager shown transfer window acumen?
It’s vital you express your opinion in a way that gives off the impression you’re familiar with the players weaknesses, strengths, and what they’ll add to the team, even if you are not. If needs be just go by what others have said and alter their words to make them your own.
Whether you decide to tweet or blog, this will be an important step in your quest to be a fully-fledged Transfer Window fan.
Step 5: Play the waiting game
You’ve shared your opinion now it is time to wait. Wait for what exactly? Well anything. Wait for any sign of movement or a deal taking place, maybe you’re just waiting for confirmation. During your waiting period numerous medicals and meetings to discuss personal terms will take place, then there will be reports of them being finalised and completed and that it will be confirmed within the next ’48 hours’.
This can sometimes be the most annoying part of the summer. People like to play with emotions, generally it’s the ITK’s seeking more attention so just repeat step 2 when necessary.
Once you’ve successfully waited you can move on the next step; the final step.
Step 6: Reaction
You’ve been through all of the above and have completed the steps. Now there is a new player in your team and you can hope for more. Maybe a player has left? The same rules still apply with a bit of alteration. It is time for you to react. Are you happy with your new signing? Are you sad that a player has left? Are you confident for next season or do you feel more business is required?
Note: Step 4 also applies here. Once you’ve finished this step you can breathe a huge sigh of relief and start a debate with your followers.
Well, there’s your guide to being a fan in the summer window. And once you’ve completed it you will have to go through it again as many other players will constantly be linked so it’s worth remembering. Until next time.
Written by Ryan Goodenough
Follow me on Twitter @RealYoungGunner
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